Well, at least according to Buzzfeed, who compared test scores and happy student score:
The Organisation for Economic Co-operation and Development’s triennial international survey compared test scores from 65 countries. Happiness was ranked based on the percentage of students who agreed or disagreed with the statement “I feel happy at school.” Test scores were ranked based on the combined individual rankings of the students’ math, reading, and science scores.
Check out this extraordinary set of videos from Think and Be Happy. It includes a couple of hundred videos featuring top psychologists, educators and buddhists monks.
Enjoy some past Happiness & Its Causes presentations – a fabulous mix of leaders in psychology, science, education, business, spirituality, the arts and more! Visit our Think & Be Happy YouTube channel here for more footage.
“I share therefor I am” Shimi Cohen is a graphic artist who has struck a cord exploring loniness in the age of connection. Nearing a million views on You Tube, the Video addresses the connection between Social Networks and Being Lonely? Quoting the words of Sherry Turkle from her TED talk – Connected, But Alone and drawing inspiration from Dr. Yair Amichai-Hamburgers hebrew article -The Invention of Loneliness, Cohen’s senior project at Shenkar College of Engineering and Design. Cohen explores the paradoxical nature of becoming connected with technology which can isolate our natural social instincts. He spent 3 weeks sketching and translating the script into visuals, using Adobe After Effects and Cinema 4D to create the 2-D animation.
What does positive psychology teach us about loneliness?
Leverage your strengths:
VIA has been researching the role using strengths in your life and how they impact your mental well being:
Using one’s signature strengths in a new way increased happiness and decreased depression for 6 months (Gander, Proyer, Ruch, & Wyss, 2012).
Using one’s signature strengths in a new way increased happiness for 6 months and decreased depression for 3 months (Mongrain & Anselmo-Matthews, 2012).
The use of one’s top strengths leads to a decreased likelihood of depression and stress and an increase in satisfaction in law students (Peterson & Peterson, 2008).
Using one’s signature strengths in a new and unique way is an effective intervention: it increased happiness and decreased depression for 6 months (Seligman, Steen, Park, Peterson, 2005).
Among high school students, other-oriented strengths (e.g., kindness, teamwork) predicted fewer depression symptoms while transcendence strengths (e.g., spirituality) predicted greater life satisfaction (Gillham et al., 2011).
Grateful individuals report higher positive mood, optimism, life satisfaction, vitality, religiousness and spirituality, and less depression and envy than less grateful individuals (McCullough, Emmons, & Tsang, 2002).
While the above are not specific to loneliness, you can see the connection between depression and loneliness.
Make meaning in your life
Sam Mullins struggled with finding meaning. A few years ago, he moved to Vancouver to pursue his dream of being a big city writer and actor. So he poured his heart and soul into it. And failed. But one night at work he was challenged to make a tinfoil dinosaur and his life changed…because he shared something authentic with a stranger. It was not always that way:
I have a social anxiety disorder, and an increasingly large hunch-back. I write stories for CBC’s DNTO sometimes. I perform one-man shows sometimes. I have suicidal thoughts sometimes. And then I write one-man shows about said suicidal thoughts.
The backdrop to the story is fascinating as he reflects on it and where it has all led:
I felt like I was the poster boy for everything wrong with my generation. I felt foolish.
My sense of entitlement, my solipsism and my delusional belief that I was a unique and talented person led me to acting school. I had graduated four years later, at great expense to my parents, and then naively stepped out into the big wide world without having the slightest inkling of how to survive. And by the end of that year, I wasn’t against the ropes. I was on life-support.
So, just like that, I was back in my childhood bedroom. I was working a labour job. And I was eating a casserole prepared by my Mother every night. I didn’t know what to do next. I felt like I was lost in the universe.
Sam is doing what Victor Frankl calls making meaning:
“In some ways suffering ceases to be suffering at the moment it finds a meaning, such as the meaning of a sacrifice.”
For you see, you are always free to choose; perhaps not your experience, but the meaning you give that experience:
“Everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of the human freedoms—to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way.”
Frankl goes on to explain the significance of love in our lives:
“Love is the only way to grasp another human being in the innermost core of his personality. No one can become fully aware of the very essence of another human being unless he loves him. By his love he is enabled to see the essential traits and features in the beloved person; and even more, he sees that which is potential in him, which is not yet actualized but yet ought to be actualized. Furthermore, by his love, the loving person enables the beloved person to actualize these potentialities. By making him aware of what he can be and of what he should become, he makes these potentialities come true.”
By the way, NPR picked up Sam’s story for the Moth
“Without gratitude, life can be lonely, depressing and impoverished,” said Emmons. “Gratitude enriches human life. It elevates, energizes, inspires and transforms. People are moved, opened and humbled through expressions of gratitude.” —Dr. Robert Emmons
With US Thanksgiving on the horizon (and Canadian Thanksgiving long gone) we turn our attention to gratitude (and Turkey). Gratitude has been shown to have a very positive effect on our wellbeing:
Stronger immune systems and lower blood pressure;
Higher levels of positive emotions;
More joy, optimism, and happiness;
Acting with more generosity and compassion;
Feeling less lonely and isolated.
Have a look at the Happier Huamn for the source of the research, 26 studies and counting. Clearly experiencing and expressing gratitude is a good thing. How grateful are you? The Greater Good Society of UC Berkeley is offer up a gratitude survey:
2. I count my blessings for what I have in this world.
Check out your current Positivity Ratio – to see how it is today – using this free, quick and easy free test (it’s one that psychologists often use).
Try doing it each day for a week or so, noting down your ratio and see if it changes. What do you think made it change? Do you need to boost your level of positive emotions?
2. Explore your positive emotions
Make a list of ten positive emotions that you can think of. For example, these might include joy, inspiration, contentment, serenity, amusement, pride, interest, or gratitude.
Pick one emotion from your list and then note down things that tend to generate this emotions for you.
Think back to the last time you felt this emotion… what was it that you were doing? Where were you? What was happening around you? What other things could make you feel this way?
What could you do to bring more of this into your life today or this week? Being more conscious of these things will help us to spot opportunities for to experience them.
Now repeat this for each of the other emotions in turn. You may wish to pick one per day or per week, to reflect on.
3. Put together a positive pack
Think of a positive emotion you’d like to feel more of. Collect together things that you associate with this emotion. This could include music tracks, pictures, photographs, poems, lines or quotes from books, video clips, objects that bring back memories etc. Depending what you collect keep these things in a box, online or in a note book or scrap book).
Find a few minutes to spend with your collection reflecting on the emotion you want to feel. Remember the action doesn’t need to be big and feeling the emotion doesn’t need to be earth shattering – a passing moment is fine.
Your pack could also include actions – simple things you can do that you know often bring you that emotion. For example if you want to try joy, you might have listed singing your favourite song at the top of your voice. For serenity it might be a walk in your favourite nearby green space.
4. Keep it up. Mix it up.
Of course there are times when positive emotions come easily and there are times when it is harder. Even when things are tough try to think of something that will distract you for the positive for a moment. And don’t forget to try different actions and emotions – some will work better for each us at different times than others. Have fun!
“I’ve learned that no matter what happens, or how bad it seems today, life does go on, and it will be better tomorrow. I’ve learned that you can tell a lot about a person by the way he/she handles these three things: a rainy day, lost luggage, and tangled Christmas tree lights. I’ve learned that regardless of your relationship with your parents, you’ll miss them when they’re gone from your life. I’ve learned that making a “living” is not the same thing as making a “life.” I’ve learned that life sometimes gives you a second chance. I’ve learned that you shouldn’t go through life with a catcher’s mitt on both hands; you need to be able to throw something back. I’ve learned that whenever I decide something with an open heart, I usually make the right decision. I’ve learned that even when I have pains, I don’t have to be one. I’ve learned that every day you should reach out and touch someone. People love a warm hug, or just a friendly pat on the back. I’ve learned that I still have a lot to learn. I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.” ― Maya Angelou
This beautiful speach highlights what Barbara Fredrickson calls Positive resonance…or what the rest of call love.
Barbara has identified 10 positive emotions that will help us Broaden and build our capacity.
I make art for a few reasons. In life, we experience so much fragmentation of thought and feeling. For me, creating art brings things back together.
I like expressing emotions—to have others feel what it is I’m feeling when I’m photographing people.
I make art primarily because I enjoy the process. It’s fun making things.
While most of us are not artists, not in the sense of making a living in things, I suspect most of us can relate to the sentiments described. Indeed art is important. A London School of Economic researcher found it to be among the MOST important things in making us happy: Of the top six most happiness-inducing activities, again after sex and exercise, the other four are all arts-related. They are, in descending order:
The New York Times if offering up a face reading emotions test. “Curious to see how you do on a test of emotional perception?”
You can take the test here. Readers comments note that all the women are young and several have “sexy” type eyes–Flirtaticous, Fantasizing or interested, whereas none such eyes exist in the men. Moreover, the men include ones that are old.
Dr. Helen Fisher has been researching and writing about love for years. Such is her wisdom and understanding, she is the Chief Scientific Advisor for Match.com, one of the internet’s leading online dating service. She gives a fascinating and fun interview with The Greater Good contrasting poetry and song lyrics with the scientific lyrics.
You can take the test here to see which are your dominant types. I hypothesize the strengths that possibly exist in each personality type:
Explorers (creative and dominated by dopamine). Known for being Highly curious, creative, energetic, spontaneous. ‘Adventure’ is the word most often used by Explorers as they describe themselves and what they are looking for in a mate. The other nine of their top ten most-used words (in descending order) are: venture, spontaneity/ spontaneous, energy, new, fun, travelling, outgoing, passion and active.
Builder (sensible and soaked in serotonin). Known for Calm, social, popular, and good at managing people, networking, and building family and community. ‘Family’ is the most-used word by Builders. Following this: honesty, caring, moral/morals, respect, loyal, trust, values, loving and trustworthy.
Director (reasoning and ruled by testosterone). Known for Analytical and logical, straightforward, decisive, tough minded, and focused. Intelligent and intelligence together top the list of words used by Directors. Also intellectual, debate, geek, nerd/nerdy, ambition/ ambitious, driven, politics, challenge/challenging and real.
Negotiator (intuitive, idealistic, and all about the estrogen and oxytocin). Known for Imaginative, intuitive, empathetic, and emotionally expressive, and have good verbal and social skills. ‘Passion’ and ‘passionate’, also real, heart, kind/kindness, sensitive, read/reader, sweet, learning.
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Dr. Helen Fisher